Time, Frozen

We’re expecting a baby any time now. The last few days have had an odd quality of expectation: any time, our family will grow.

It makes time seem to freeze, to stand still.

We have Jacob, about to start fifth grade and middle school. But here he is, still a sweet and affectionate kid as ever. He loves to care for cats and seeks them out often. He still keeps an eye out for the stuffed butterfly he’s had since he was an infant, and will sometimes carry it and a favorite blanket around the house. He will also many days prepare the “Yellow House News” on his computer, with headlines about his day and some comics pasted in — before disappearing to play with Legos for awhile.

And Oliver, who will walk up to Laura and “give baby a hug” many times throughout the day — and sneak up to me, try to touch my arm, and say “doink” before running off before I can “doink” him back. It was Oliver that had asked for a baby sister for Christmas — before he knew he’d be getting one!

In the past week, we’ve had out the garden hose a couple of times. Both boys will enjoy sending mud down our slide, or getting out the “water slide” to play with, or just playing in mud. The rings of dirt in the bathtub testify to the fun that they had. One evening, I built a fire, we made brats and hot dogs, and then Laura and I sat visiting and watching their water antics for an hour after, laughter and cackles of delight filling the air, and cats resting on our laps.

These moments, or countless others like Oliver’s baseball games, flying the boys to a festival in Winfield, or their cuddles at bedtime, warm the heart. I remember their younger days too, with fond memories of taking them camping or building a computer with them. Sometimes a part of me wants to just keep soaking in things just as they are; being a parent means both taking pride in children’s accomplishments as they grow up, and sometimes also missing the quiet little voice that can be immensely excited by a caterpillar.

And yet, all four of us are so excited and eager to welcome a new life into our home. We are ready. I can’t wait to hold the baby, or to lay her to sleep, to see her loving and excited older brothers. We hope for a smooth birth, for mom and baby.

Here is the crib, ready, complete with a mobile with a cute bear (and even a plane). I can’t wait until there is a little person here to enjoy it.

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