The Changelog

Here's what it's been doing:

2 days ago: high of 69
yesterday: daytime high of 23 plus "breezy" winds at 30MPH
today: forecasted high of 26, 3-7 inches of snow, winds at 25MPH, gusting to 35MPH

Yesterday, I drove to the doctor's office and back to work, a drive of about 15 minutes. During that time, I encountered:

• calm
• thunder and lightning
• freezing rain bad enough that my windshield almost froze over in less than 5 minutes
• calm again
• sleet

I've heard people from all over the country say, "if you don't like our weather, wait 5 minutes."

In Kansas, we really mean it.

It's been a few weeks since my last house update.

I've posted some new photos of the project.

The new insulation has been sprayed. It's a foam type of insulation that dries solid. It not only acts as an insulator, but also as a sealant, filling in little cracks that could let air in and out of the house. In some places it is up to 12 inches thick -- mostly in the attic.

After that, work on the drywall began. By this point, it's pretty much done and interior painting should be starting this week. After the painting, the next thing will be the floor restoration.

Concrete work got started last week. The porches are being re-built now, and in the photo below, you can see the forms starting to be in place for them.

So the appearance of the interior has changed dramatically over the past few weeks, mainly because there are now walls there.

Here's the usual sample photo:

Back before Jacob was born, I was reading The Expectant Father: Facts, Tips, and Advice for Dads-to-Be, 2nd ed. by Armin A. Brott and Jennifer Ash. It was a good book and I recommend it.

Towards the end, there was a section that the author clearly was passionate about, and it made me mad too.

He was talking about society's attitudes towards dads. He started by looking at messages that are sent out in commercials. One study of commercials said that "100% of jerks singled out in male-female relationships were male. There were no exceptions. . ." That study also said that 100% of the ignorant and incompetant people in commercials were male as well.

He went on to cite some examples. Tons of slogans like "kid tested, mother approved", "choosy moms choose Jif", Robitussin's "recommended by Dr. Mom", etc. And one for Post Raisin Bran in which a father and daughter are impressed by their cereal. Dad says, "somebody must really love us. Who do you think it is?" The daughter answers, "Mommy!"

Of course, these were just some examples from commercials, but they seem to reflect a message that dads are, at best, incompetant. Brott mentions studies that show that men display the same decision-making skill and affection as parents as women do.

Brott went on to talk about some of his experiences. One time, while he was in a park playing with his children, a little girl started to fall off the top of a slide. He was right there and was able to catch her as she fell -- probably saving her from, at best, a broken bone. The girl's mother rushed over, ignored Brott, and said to the girl, "did he hurt you?"

I started to see this sort of thing all over the place even before Jacob was born. In stores, there would be tons of infant shirts, bibs, etc. saying things like "I love mommy," rarely even one thing that mentioned daddy. Similar patterns were there for greeting cards and pretty much everything else baby-related.

I've noticed this even more since Jacob was born. There have been times when Terah and I are somewhere together, standing right beside each other, and someone will ask Terah all about Jacob, and totally ignore me. Even if I'm the one holding him. I'm sure people are well-intentioned; some of them that have done this are people we know well and I know they mean well. Somtimes, I don't even notice when this is going on (though Terah does and when she mentions it later, I remember it).

Do they just expect that men don't care? Or do they think that since Terah is working part time, and I'm working full time, that we must be "traditional" enough that I don't care to be involved in Jacob's life? (Though I'm not sure that the "detached & uninvolved dad" stereotype ever was true, at least from the examples I can think of) It's hard to miss out on so many moments of Jacob's life during the day that Terah gets to be there for. But that doesn't mean that I'm an uninvolved or clueless dad.

Now, despite this little rant, there are quite a few people out there that have no problem including me in discussions about Jacob -- relatives, friends, people at church, co-workers, etc. In fact, probably more people include me than don't. I really appreciate that, and especially the extra effort some of them go to in order to include me. (I know how much effort it took to find baby clothes that mention dad, for instance) Terah is best at all this, making sure that I get to be part of Jacob's life as much as I possibly can be, and I really appreciate that.

But to Wyeth (makers of Robitussin): Don't think I haven't noticed that Walgreens sells "Wal-Tussin", same active ingredients as your product, and at a lower price. Dr. Dad knows how to buy generic.

I haven't had a lot of time to blog lately, so it's time to catch up on a few things.

Jacob is now almost 12 pounds. He's been growing well. As Terah mentioned, he has been colicy. He seems a bit better in the past few days. He usually has started getting fussy just before I get home from work, and continue through the evening. So I hadn't been able to see him happy all that often for a few weeks there. It's a lot of fun to be around him when he's happy.

The house is coming along nicely, too. Drywall is up inside, siding is up outside, the propane line is installed, water line is installed, power is run to the house, and phone service is installed as well. Bathtubs have been set in place. The furnace is set in place, though not yet hooked up to the duct system. Network/phone cable (CAT6 for it all) is run, as is coax cable. Interior painting starts next week. The house has changed appearance dramatically over the past few weeks.

We were looking at some "before" pictures to figure out how we wanted to structure our porch. It looked bad back then, but compared to how it is now -- well, it looked even worse.

The annual pillars banquet for Bethesda Home was a few weeks ago. I'm on the board at Bethesda (which has been a good experience), and board members pitch in to make the event happen -- it's our largest fundraiser event of the year. I took photos last year, and again this year. They're posted online. Bethesda was founded in 1899 and has been an important feature of our small community ever since. I'll write more about it sometime.

Things still seem busy here. Between taking care of Jacob, being in a temporary residence (everything takes longer because so many things are in boxes or just not accessible), keeping on top of all the decisions for the renovation, and all the mundane things of moving twice, there's not a lot of free time. Hopefully that situation will improve a bit, but then we will of course have the big move into the house -- probably in January sometime.